A lifer expat mummy in Kuwait blogging on things to do in Kuwait for kids and adults, places to visit, fun and cultural events, general info, shopping bargains and interesting stuff. Email: LWDLIK@gmail.com
Hi EB, thanks for commenting. Sometimes the realisation comes after many years of listening, cajoling, encouragment, effort, patience, worry, pain and tears. Always respectfully and mostly honestly. The latter depending on what you think you can dare to say without going too far. I found that the above quote helped replace a little of the guilt.
Hi EB, I tried reading the info on www.chomsky.info and I'll need another coffee before I tackle some more. The video was plain and simple :OD Thank you for both. The quote above is really a kind of permission for me (albeit rather selfish) to release some of the guilt I feel for distancing myself from those people. They have, for a very long time, been going through depression, apathy, complete lack of any joy and denial. It has taken its toll on me and others (also very selfish I know) and would leave me sad, depleted, drained, frustrated and angry. We are all battling our own problems and demons and a certain amount of ownership is on your own shoulders to help yourself. The burden can be very great on those around them. I have great friends and family who are very supportive but if everyday I was to whine and moan about how sad my life is it would be unfair on those dear friends who are dealing with their own problems too. People absorb off your good and bad energy and it is just wrong to burden them constantly with your crap, refuse any kind of logical help (meds or therapy), dwell in your misery and then blame them for not being good friends. My particular case is over 20 years and has quite honestly got me to the conclusion that one has to 'want' to help oneself. I know when you're in depression that is not always possible but after all these years surely anyone would be ready to get help?
Had/have some one like that and he drained the life out of me....wow it is painful even thinking of him, not to mention the 6 times longer than my average phone call, 6 times a day!
I don't only answer once a week.
Loving some one you dislike or disliking some one you love....common :)
But darn you are strong.... the above describes two years, how did you manage 20!!! That is like 60 years of hard labor!
Dear EB, I thought initially that you meant I should reach out and show more love. But if you've been in the same boat you know just how draining and uncomfortable a relationship is like that. Not sure if it's really any good for either party. I'm fine but you do have to be strong to let them go Both are females. Don't let me even start on the male stalker.
EB
ReplyDeleteDepends on how one comes to that realization.
But to be sure, identify the problems, evaluate, if it is not solvable, just down grade to limited relation.
Respect and honesty are constants of course.
Hi EB, thanks for commenting. Sometimes the realisation comes after many years of listening, cajoling, encouragment, effort, patience, worry, pain and tears. Always respectfully and mostly honestly. The latter depending on what you think you can dare to say without going too far. I found that the above quote helped replace a little of the guilt.
ReplyDeleteohhh...time and date are off...it is not the 27 th thats for sure.
ReplyDeleteQue?
DeleteKim, How about you do an experiment by posting this :
ReplyDeleteChomsky is the best in English, English being a Language. http://www.chomsky.info/
This is what he said on love: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRO-WE3GldQ
I say: “Creatures are dependents of GOD. Therefore most beloved by GOD equates most beneficial to his creatures”.
Maybe EB
Hi EB, I tried reading the info on www.chomsky.info and I'll need another coffee before I tackle some more. The video was plain and simple :OD Thank you for both.
DeleteThe quote above is really a kind of permission for me (albeit rather selfish) to release some of the guilt I feel for distancing myself from those people. They have, for a very long time, been going through depression, apathy, complete lack of any joy and denial. It has taken its toll on me and others (also very selfish I know) and would leave me sad, depleted, drained, frustrated and angry.
We are all battling our own problems and demons and a certain amount of ownership is on your own shoulders to help yourself. The burden can be very great on those around them. I have great friends and family who are very supportive but if everyday I was to whine and moan about how sad my life is it would be unfair on those dear friends who are dealing with their own problems too. People absorb off your good and bad energy and it is just wrong to burden them constantly with your crap, refuse any kind of logical help (meds or therapy), dwell in your misery and then blame them for not being good friends.
My particular case is over 20 years and has quite honestly got me to the conclusion that one has to 'want' to help oneself. I know when you're in depression that is not always possible but after all these years surely anyone would be ready to get help?
Had/have some one like that and he drained the life out of me....wow it is painful even thinking of him, not to mention the 6 times longer than my average phone call, 6 times a day!
ReplyDeleteI don't only answer once a week.
Loving some one you dislike or disliking some one you love....common :)
But darn you are strong.... the above describes two years, how did you manage 20!!! That is like 60 years of hard labor!
EB
Dear EB, I thought initially that you meant I should reach out and show more love. But if you've been in the same boat you know just how draining and uncomfortable a relationship is like that. Not sure if it's really any good for either party. I'm fine but you do have to be strong to let them go Both are females. Don't let me even start on the male stalker.
ReplyDelete